Saber almost had sex last night. It was an amazing night. As many of you already know, Im leaving SC. Im bored, and want to spend time with real people, instead of sim people. Last night everything was perfect. Dinner was fantastic. Teresa looked beautiful. When she smiles, it lights up the room. Shae actually thinks Im funny too, how sick is that? After dinner we went to a club. We didnt stay too long. The young people were fucking annoying, and modern music sucks ass. Teresa looks at me, and says, lets just go to your house, and she gives me , one of those sexy shoulder rolls, only women know how to do. When she got to my house, she was amazed by my extensive DVD collection. We watched movies, and over the night were making out, more and more. the action getting hotter and heavier. Im thinking, OH YEAH!!!!!!!. Then she layed her head on my chest, teared up a bit. "your so different Saber, all the other guys Ive gone out with, all they want is sex" Then she sucked my tongue out of my mouth. She then laid on my chest and went to sleep. So, Ive got a hot chick on my chest sleeping on top of my woodie, and I havent scored since last September.

Wildeyes, the name is feared in SC. This insane woman is the most psycho female, no person in SC. But, what do we really know of Wild. this reporter got the exclusive interview. this is her story.
Wild wasn't born like me and you. Her parents were involved in a top secret government experiment. they were genitec engineers. Her parents were test tubes and DNA from of the most insane people known to mankind. She is spliced with DNA from Hitler, Stalin, and the Staypuff Marshmellow man. We will probably never know all the true facts. Those records have been destroyed, and the people killed. Wild went to school in central Flordia. Her adopted parents treated her right, but they knew something was wrong. In kindergarten, the teacher said its nap time wild. Wild shoved a crayon in her left eye. the teacher survived. she is still in an institution. Junior high was rough on wild. she couldn't fit in. One of the jocks yelled, " Hey wild! You got boobies now!" Wild ran him thru a paper shreeder. the authorities thought wild could be reformed. They were so wrong. Homecoming, 2001, Nerd tech has a big game against Jock high. wild is the head cheerleader, she beat up all the competition. Jock highs QB yelled " show me your tits" Bad mistake, wild shoved a pompom up his ass at the 50 yard line, in front of 3ooo people. Wild was asked to leave the area. she wandered the USA. She did a few bank robberies, and assaults to support herself.
She ended up in Texas. She planned on robbing a ranch she had spied out. Pink and Sam were at that ranch. They convinced her, that she wasnt wrong in the head. Evil is fun. But evil must be controlled. Wild now kills, like she always wanted. But she is thinking before she kills. Well 5 seconds, but she thinks.

Urine a lot of trouble mister!

John L recently won the 14th National Golden Shower Piss Off. The competition was attended by many perverts, and recently paroled inmates. John L was in trouble early. He had a hair over his 2 inch penis in the compulsories, and had split spray. This put him in fourth place going into the freestyle part of the competition. John L had to pick up the pace and he did. He did a East German reverse double anal drip reclining swallow. This move hasn't been done since the great Greek Golden Shower Champion Constantine Drunkurineov did it at the Helsinki meet in 1965. After the event, John L had the following to say. " Ive been pissing on friends and feds for a long time, leading up to this competition. Ill piss on anybody. I'll lie, cheat, I dont care. I will piss on anyone."

TRAITOR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

UCMJ. Uniform Code of Military Justice for you JohnL...You stand charged with the following crimes. How do you plead?

894. ART. 94. MUTINY OR SEDITION
(a) Any person subject to this chapter who--
(1) with intent to usurp or override lawful military authority, refuses, in concert with any other person, to obey orders or otherwise do his duty or creates any violence or disturbance is guilty of mutiny;
(2) with intent to cause the overthrow or destruction of lawful civil authority, creates, in concert with any other person, revolt, violence, or disturbance against that authority is guilty of sedition;
(3) fails to do his utmost to prevent and suppress a mutiny or sedition being committed in his presence, or fails to take all reasonable means to inform his superior commissioned officer or commanding officer of a mutiny or sedition which he knows or has reason to believe is taking place, is guilty of a failure to suppress or report a mutiny or sedition.
(b) A person who is found guilty of attempted mutiny, mutiny, sedition, or failure to suppress or report a mutiny or sedition shall be punished by death or such other punishment as a court- martial may direct.


899. ART. 99. MISBEHAVIOR BEFORE THE ENEMY
Any person subject to this chapter who before or in the presence of the enemy--
(1) runs away;
(2) shamefully abandons, surrenders, or delivers up any command, unit, place, or military property which it is his duty to defend;
(3) through disobedience, neglect, or intentional misconduct endangers the safety of any such command, unit, place, or military property;
(4) casts away his arms or ammunition;
(5) is guilty of cowardly conduct;
(6) quits his place of duty to plunder or pillage;
(7) causes false alarms in any command, unit, or place under control of the armed forces;
(8) willfully fails to do his utmost to encounter, engage, capture, or destroy any enemy troops, combatants, vessels, aircraft, or any other thing, which it is his duty so to encounter, engage, capture, or destroy; or
(9) does not afford all practicable relief and assistance to any troops, combatants, vessels, or aircraft of the armed forces belonging to the United States or their allies when engaged in battle;
shall be punished by death or such punishment as a court- martial may direct.


900. ART. 100. SUBORDINATE COMPELLING SURRENDER
Any person subject to this chapter who compels or attempts to compel the commander of any place, vessel, aircraft, or military property, or of any body of members of the armed forces, to give it up to an enemy or to abandon it, or who strikes the colors or flag to any enemy without proper authority, shall be punished by death or such other punishment as a court-martial may direct.


904. ART. 104. AIDING THE ENEMY
Any person who--
(1) aids, or attempts to aid, the enemy with arms, ammunition, supplies, money, or other things; or
(2) without proper authority, knowingly harbors or [protects or gives intelligence to or communicates or corresponds with or holds any intercourse with the enemy, either directly or indirectly;
shall suffer death or such other punishment as a court-martial or military commission may direct.


And I threw this in because I found it amusing...

925. ART. 125. SODOMY
(a) Any person subject to this chapter who engages in unnatural carnal copulation with another person of the same or opposite sex or with an animal is guilty of sodomy. Penetration , however slight, is sufficient to complete the offense.
(b) Any person found guilty of sodomy shall be punished as a court-martial may direct.


Any attacks by you on the person bringing these charges will result in me coming back to GR and kicking your ass. I hate GR. And coming back is unpleasant to me. But for you I will make the sacrifice. More time answering charges less time preening in messages.


Treason even in a game is despicable....

Barny has a party

LDI had its summer BBQ at the Sam Houston ranch this weekend. Much fun was had, as the whole Fed turned out. The Honorble BarnyRubble , who is extremely elderly, was presented with a 4X4 power chair. Much merriment was had by all. Slock attacked random people for no reason, and Wild killed some people, who just looked at her wrong. Saber told many bad jokes. He then got drunk, and hit on Sams hot daughter. After he removed a branding iron from his ass, Saber settled down and had a good time.
As usual LDI plotted on each other. Wild heated the branding iron before Sam used it on Saber. Wild slashed slocks tires. We thought Barn was passed out, old you know, but he was grounding wilds LU countries. Saber pissed in the potato salad, but that wasn't an official plot, because he did it in front of everyone. Sam walked around alot going MEH. Sam later took candy from every other kid at the event. He told them they were next.

FAQ

This Faq was copied from the evil Sam Houstons blog.

1. What is the Lacerta Defense Initiative and how do I get my own…..

The Lacerta Defense Initiative is a collective of soverign nations ruled by a common ideology. To serve the interests of its membership by any means neccessary. You cannot join. You are chosen. We are not for sale but can be rented for a nominal fee….

2. Why should I pick the Lacerta Defense Initiative as my Federation? What do you offer your members?

Nothing! You are chosen you twit ask again and be beaten with a rubber hose!

3. Jeeze ok I am just comparing Federations… Ok what makes your Federation better than all the others?

We dont recruit. We are a theocratic oligarchy devoted to the worship of the Pinktator and to spread his message of love and wisdom.

4. What is the message?

We devalue the ones and zeros in order to touch the humanity in each player….And to pwn them.

5. Well thats a horrible message to suscribe to. I would never join such a horrible evil organization..

Good. No one asked you.

6. Well what else do you offer your members….

We have a great dental plan and encourage sim evil in all our members.

7. How is sim evil a worthwhile pursuit for an entire Federation?

Its a game.

8. Well do you have a code of conduct? A constitution? Ranks? A training Fed? A common market? or branches?

No.

9. Well all Feds have these things.

We are not other Feds.

Posted in Uncategorized

LDI test the Leeroy Jenkins Strat

LDI recently tested a new war tactic. It is called the Leeroy Jenkins strat. The test ran very successfully, and we are proud to share it with everyone on LU. Its no longer top secret since it has been posted on youtube. It is a very simple strategy to implement.
First of all your Federation must plan meticulously for a long term war. You must have meetings, stockpile weapons, assign declarations, and so-on. Then one of you younger gung ho players unilaterally declares war on about 10 countries at once with no warning at all. We have found that this confusing tactic is very promising. We have tested it in other games. Here is a video of one experiment.

LEEROY JENKINS



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